


i told my therapist about you

by VeryCoolKid69



Series: vehement [3]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Depressed TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Exiled TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Gen, Mentioned Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Dave | Technoblade, Mentioned Toby Smith | Tubbo, Mentioned Wilbur Soot, Mythology References, Panic Attacks, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, TW TW TW TW, TommyInnit Angst (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit-centric (Video Blogging RPF), short fic sorry y'all but hey at least im double posting, tommy ponders life on the edge of a lava cliff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:27:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28278369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VeryCoolKid69/pseuds/VeryCoolKid69
Summary: Tommy lets out a breath, and smiles up at the ceiling.This was it, huh? The end of Tommyinnit.And with his arms outstretched in a cruel mockery of his father’s wings, he thinks, ‘what shall be my last words?’/// or, in which Tommy sits at a cliff and thinks about old myths.
Series: vehement [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2091294
Comments: 12
Kudos: 280
Collections: Completed stories I've read





	i told my therapist about you

**Author's Note:**

> Double posting pog??
> 
> also major TW sorry 
> 
> also sorry about it being short i just wanted to write something rifeienej

Tommy dangles over the lava without a care, and with the heat of the lava baking on his face, he thinks.

‘Who am I?’

A simple question, really. Ranboo is Ranboo. Dream is Dream. Technoblade is Technoblade.

But, when you overthink it, it gets deeper. More personal.

Ranboo is a newcomer. Dream is his only friend. Techno is a traitor of a brother.

Tommy is… someone. 

Tommy is everyone but himself. Tommy is Wilbur’s right hand man. Tommy is the exiled. Tommy is a danger, Tommy is a traitor. 

Tommy is a hero, and Tommy is a villain.

Slowly, he stands up, stretching out weary limbs. Is this really going to be the end of Tommyinnit?

Yes. Yes it was.

He glances down to the lava yet again. How many people have died this way? How many people have fallen in? Many, perhaps. Of course his death would follow someone else’s story. Icarus, perhaps, is the closest one he can think of. Maybe there’s a closer one, one that follows his exact story, but Icarus is the only one he can think of. A greedy child who burned as he fell. Sounds about right.

He wonders, distantly, if Techno’s stories are true. Ancient history, old Gods that watch over them and predict their every move. He wonders if any of them are watching him right now, as he dangles over the pit with his arms stretches out like melting wings. 

“If any of you Gods are witnessing this, just know I will never be a victim again.” He voices, as if there was someone there actually listening. Of course there was not, no God would spend their time watching a child cry into fire. There will be no witnesses to this tragedy, the only evidence of Tommy ever being there would be the crudely written note tucked away in his tent for someone to find, if anyone.

They’d only find it if they visited. He doubts they will.

He huffs a laugh, a tired sound. No God would be here today, no one would have made him. He made himself this way, it was his fault. Perhaps god was dead, and they were the reason why. He’d understand, honestly. He’d die too if it meant getting out of this hellhole.

Maybe that’s why he’s dangling over a pit.

God, he wishes he was the old him again. Back when he didn't have a prophecy to follow, back when he was happy and it was just him and Tubbo against the world.

He’ll never be that him again, and now, in the end, it was him against himself. Fighting for his own life. It would not be him against any god or any man, it would be nothing but an internal war.

After all, that was how Wilbur died. Of course he’d go out the same.

Back then, he only wanted his discs and his friends, perhaps some independence on the side. Now all he wants is a place to curl up and die in peace. How times change.

There was barely a year difference between the two Tommy’s. He was an innocent child then, and he’s a child now. Just without the innocence.

He probably would be as happy as he was then if he didn't keep looking for happiness in the same place lost it. Perhaps he’d be happy in Techno’s home, or hell, even on another server. But every time he considers it, his mind wanders back to Tubbo. 

Tubbo. He wants to go back to Tubbo.

But, the thing was, even if he could go back, he wouldn’t belong there anymore. They’ve grown past the need for him, past the want for him. He is no longer needed since he’s made his sacrifices.

Tommy lets out a breath, and smiles up at the ceiling. 

This was it, huh? The end of Tommyinnit.

And with his arms outstretched in a cruel mockery of his father’s wings, he thinks, ‘what shall be my last words?’

Tommy is not original. Tommy is a copy and paste. His story is not his own. His story is that of Theseus, the exiled hero. His story is Wilbur’s, the hero turned villain, betrayed by an old friend. His story is Icarus’s, the greedy child who flew too close to the Sun.

His last words will never be his own. There is nothing he could say before he falls that would never have been said before. His final words will be a quote from so many others before him, something an old myth or a new friend has already said sometime before. He will never be his own creation.

And so, it is decided, as he salutes the air in a mockery of so many greater people before him. A smile plays on his face, as he utters his final stolen words.

“It was never meant to be.”

**Author's Note:**

> can y'all guess what my favorite mcyt is? hint: I've never written about them


End file.
